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My wife Kelly and I went to Arkansas recently to meet my family. They weren't the least bit interested about my happiness
or transformation. My mom LOVED the pictures. In fact, she took them off my hands. Thank goodness for digital technology.
( More to come.)
Well, as a result of my mass-outing, I've found I had people in my corner that I just knew I was going to lose.
I think I am finding additional courage from being secure in that knowledge.
If this comes to no other good. If I can use this site as a vessel to educate my family and others, it will be
worth the effort.
Coming Out.....Continued
Do we define ourselves as people by the amount of people we are OUT to? That question has been mulling around my head
for a while now.
Anyway, two weeks ago, I went to Arkansas (to introduce myself) to the REST of my family. They knew about me, but
saying you accept it and really accepting it once you are actually at ground zero are two entirely different things.
As you can guess, I lost a family member. Only one in a family I'll be the first to tell is a cross between Springer
and Deliverance. I was amazed at the kind words of encouragement I received from them. Maybe, a good slap in the face is what
it took to wake their minds up from prejudice and hate.
I have an uncle who I never had a distinct memory of without saying some slur. F^%$# this, F%$^& that, F&^%$%
Fags, etc. Well, this man sat down with me and expressed his concern for my safety, economic well-being, and I believe an
honest hurt inside himself for not being able to see what I was going through all those F&&%^%$ years. He then told
me that I would have indeed made my father proud. Also saying I was the best MAN he ever knew , and I was now even more so
in his eyes.
Then, of course, is the plethora of girltalk that I am now more than privy to. My female cousins, who never wanted
anything to do with me, have made 3 or 4 phone calls to me since just to talk. I feel most fortunate to have found this out.
Kinda' makes me wonder what I was sooooo scared of all those years. It also makes me sad that I had missed ALL that for those
same many years. Enough for now. More to come........
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Recently, the topic of expanding your comfort zones has came up alot. I have confronted my comfort zone being invaded
constantly. Well, nothing quite prepared me for what I became aware of a couple days ago.
I found out that I had been OUTED to the people I work for. ( I work as a male) This had been said to these people
3 weeks ago and have worked by my side a bit. Treated me no differently than anyone else. MORE TO COME!
Well, the worst is over with. I have been reduced to a couple days of work per week, and then reduced further in
how I was treated by my co-workers to a point where I resigned.
That, as I see it, has been a blessing in disguise. At the suggestion of a dear friend, I have chosen to start
my own construction company. She has graciously offered to let me use her truck, tools, and labor as needed to meet this objective.
I think this area is in great need of a company that understands and caters to the LGBT community. Thank you sis.
I think that this endeavor will be very therapeutic for me in dealing with people in everyday situations. At
least it will help me put an end to the double-life I have been living for so long.
That is what really pissed me off most about the way my former employer handled this situation.
He knew damn good and well that I was doing this out of respect for him and his business. Hell, I even thought he understood
to a degree. He knew that when the time came that I couldn't pass anymore, I would resign to keep from causing some kind of
trouble that could hurt his business. He knew damn good and well that all he had to do was say, "Hey D, I can't have
you around anymore because of....." Did he show me that kind of decency in return? HELL NO. To that end I can only say
one thing, "Be a man......Or get you one." I am going to keep on doing the same work, just for myself. I built his
company, I'll build ours. I can't wait to see how this turns out. MORE 2 COME !!!!!!!!!
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ALL IN
Well, I finally did it. On Thursday, February 23, 2006 at approximately 9:39 am, I legally and forever became Kassidy.
When I walked away from that stand, I felt as if I was walking on clouds. The world could have melted away and I would have
been completely oblivious. Things are now proper and the feelings of completeness and belonging to this world abound. (MORE
LATER)
I would like to impart some advice:
How the next generation of Transpeople are accepted, will be dependent on the examples WE set today !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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